The Delusions of the Perfect Affair Partner

Should you and your significant other decide to attempt reconciliation after the affair it is important to realize what you are up against. Whether you understand it or not you are competing with an entity in the affair partner that has been placed on a pedestal and inflicted brain damage on a wandering partner. Those in an affair surrender common sense and rational thought while in an affair. Removing these thoughts and feelings from a wandering partner are difficult and take time. Over the course of an affair a wandering partner has inevitably played the comparison game between his affair partner and the partner whom they have betrayed. During these states of comparison and utter insanity the wandering partner believes that they have often found their soul mate, the person whom completes them and often are willing to sacrifice everything to be with the affair partner, their destiny. The affair partner becomes almost addictive and the secrecy and forbidden nature of an affair only intensifies these feelings. It is difficult to point out the flaws of their intoxicating relationship while in this infatuated state. It only drives them to the affair partner at times. Friends and family attempts to reason with the wandering partner often fall on deaf ears because they just do not understand or bear witness to the connection of the affair partner in the eyes of the wandering partner. What you have is a delusional individual unable to see the forest through the trees. Someone who is at conflict with themselves as they juggle what they know is the truth (they are cheating) versus justification (My relationship is poor so I enjoy being happy too among many other excuses). The perfect partner often fades after a little eye opening and the discovery of the affair. Once the forbidden fruit has been witnessed being tasted by the masses the intrigue begins to fade. When the drape of secrecy is removed it often reveals the ordinary nature of the affair partner and the wandering partner becomes somewhat grounded in reality. The affair partner and the wandering partner begin to see the true nature of the relationship emerges out into the open. A connection filled with lies, deceit, selfishness, immaturity and a difficulty handling life when things become difficult. Initially the wandering partner resents the betrayed partner for forcing an end to the affair and this often drives a short term rekindling of the affair after being caught. It usually takes some time for the effects of the affair to wear off but once affairs are discovered it is comical how quickly the wandering partners find the errors in their ways and attempt to return to the friendly confines of a person whom they suddenly realize has always loved them, cared for them, and demonstrated the true meaning of love.